Tattle Tale...

Puddles.

2011-04-13T19:34:00.001-04:00

We have had quite the rainy weather as of late here in Boston and while most are dreading the weather I am loving it. I heard endless complaints today at work regarding the rain. Its too cold. Its too wet. Traffic was awful. My umbrella broke. I fell in a puddle (this one I chuckled at). However, I love how rain makes everything smell fresh. I love puddles and purposely splashing in them as if I were 6 years old. I love how the street lights look from my window. I love my rainboots. I love the frantic look on those without rainboots. I love how pretty the flowers will be in about a month and how green the grass will be. I love my obnoxiously bright yellow rain jacket. Not to mention all the goofy reasons rain is fabulous...If you are ever thirsty, stick out your tongue. Theres virtually no risk of getting skin cancer. If you are lucky enough to own a car, its a free car wash. Bet you didn't think of that huh? My point is, just because it is raining doesn't mean you'll be sleepy or more crabby. It doesn't mean your day is going to be a bad day and it certainly doesn't mean you have to complain. Even if its dreary and cloudy out there can still be sunshine in ya mind.

Materialistic Lovin

2011-03-27T21:21:00.006-04:00

I like to think that I am the type of person who needs very little, in terms of materialistic possessions, to be happy. After all, my dream is to live in some hut, sleeping on dirt, and having no more than a backpack of possessions. I often hold on to pictures and cards more than gifts because the pictures and cards hold memories the gifts cant. With that said...I have realized by spending the past 24 hours with a cold and in bed, I have four favorite objects that I hope to figure out a way to cram into said backpack when sleeping in that dirt hut.

If you don't have a non-spill water bottle and coffee mug I suggest you stop reading now and go get one. They are a fabulous necessity. This happens to be the non-spill coffee mug I own and swear by. This baby tumbles in my bag all day long and not a drip comes out.

Second, if you don't have a husband pillow you are highly missing out. If your unaware of what a husband pillow is its the pillow with the arms for support-like a husband...hence the name. I acquired this lovely gem unexpectedly and I cant think of anything, other than my coffee mug, that makes me happier at the moment.

Third, my down comforter. Fluffy, soft, cuddly, feathery, warm, comforting. Need I say more?

Fourth and maybe the most important, my journal. I finally filled up my first journal cover to cover. I had this particular journal given to me by a coworker-who frankly was off her rocker-but it was such a special journal I never wrote in it. I did not want it to be one of those "dear diary" journals but wanted the writing to be more substantial and never felt I had worthy words to write down. While filling the journal full is an exciting feat I now have to find a new journal thats worthy of the content that goes on the inside. Any suggestions where to get one!?

I realize this is somewhat of a silly post but what can you do when you're doped up on Niquil? ...maybe thats a 5th object Id cram into my backpack....

The Big 2-1.

2011-03-27T13:44:00.004-04:00

I figure having a semi reoccurring blog I am somewhat obligated to write about turning 21. Birthdays are not necessarily my thing...at least mine and turning 21 seems more a birthday to celebrate drinking than being born. So, needless to say I find turning 21 more of a convenience than a reason to celebrate. I find much more pleasure out of other peoples birthdays mainly because making someone else feel fabulously special is more fun to me and all the attention makes me feel really goofy.However, I dont think this birthday could have been more perfect.

My birthday this year was strung out over 2 weeks, starting in Ireland with Lauren and then coming back to the states for more celebrations. First, I didnt tell anyone at work it was my birthday, again the whole attention thing is just a tad overwhelming for me. However, my secret was blow upon the arrival of my favorite flowers-Peonies. After work I went to the DMV to get my updated license and ran into someone I haven't seen in YEARS! We chatted, set up a play date, and went on my way.Then I came home and my lovely friend from URI ventured down to stay part of the weekend with me. Thursday night was spectacular. My Sassy Girl and a beer in my bed...I am not sure if there is something I would enjoy more...maybe wine, My Sassy Girl and my bed, either way it was a wonderful Thursday night.

Friday is when the real celebration started. I had a wonderful dinner at some random place I "yelped." If you don't know of yelp.com its super fabulous for finding new places to try...or dates to plan (hehe). I sent out an invite to a moshposh of people kinda expecting it to be a come and go type thing and wasn't really sure who all would be there...however, it turned out to be a very good group...and after my second tequila

sunrise, I think anyone could have waltzed in and I would have been thrilled. After dinner, we met up with a few of my other friends and went back to my apt...nothing worth mentioning here. It was good to see some old friends and some I see every week and it was especially to see my favorite niece in the whole world (shes currently my only one so I can say that.)

It feels a little odd thinking I'm 21, not because I can legally buy booze, but just to think of what I have done in the past 21 years seems both successful yet insignificant. It was encouraging to see the people who really care about you and incredibly fun to merge my new friends with some of the ones I have known since I was in a training bra. So, to everyone that was out with me that night and happens to stumble upon this entry...thank you, you made a very cliché birthday very meaningful and memorable!

My first "legal" drink which I didn't get carded for...

My Nipplace I wore for the majority of the night. One of my best friends who's also a nursing student made this for me! Its a whole bunch of little nipp bottles made into a necklace...surprisingly I took this picture today and all of them are still full.

My favorite flowers that were delivered to work...This isn't the exact arrangement but its close :)

He about leaked his knickers.

2011-03-21T07:38:00.007-04:00

If you read laurens blog as well as mine this post may be a tad redundant...

The title of this blog is merely one saying I heard while visiting Ireland and believe me, it is one I will never forget. My best friend, Lauren, is studying abroad in Ireland for the entire semester and I decided that 5 months without seeing my “kindred soul” (inside joke I promise I wont reference too many) was not an option…plus who doesn’t want to frolic through one of the greenest places I have ever seen with your best friend.

This was my first time in Europe and I had no idea what to expect. I wasn’t nervous flying by myself but more excited about the unknown (of course). I loved the idea of flying into Paris and knowing enough French to get by without looking too American J. The initial contrast I noticed between Europe and Boston was just how easy going and friendly everyone was. Not that Bostonians aren’t friendly but id say there is a fast pace ”got to run!” mentality that even I often fall into. The moment I stepped on the plane in Paris I was talking to some businessman. Call me naive--an American girl traveling alone to Europe talking to a strange man--but he was quite entertaining and no Liam Nelson skills were required.

Once arriving in Ireland I caught a bus to Galway where Lauren is studying. Being the “coffee addict” that I am I had to get a quick cup before boarding the bus. This is where I instantly gave away my American background. I asked the barista why they had no black coffee on the menu. He giggled at me and went “oh you Americans…that’s why this one (pointing to the Americano) is named after you.” However, this was thesecond best coffee I have ever tasted (Ethiopian coffee can kick some serious coffee bum.) So, coffee in tow I now boarded the bus to meet up with Lauren.

I love taking the T and the bus throughout Boston but I do say that Ireland has a much prettier view out the window. The landscape reminded me a lot of Indiana. Lush green grounds contrasting with bright blue skies spotted with little labs and cows all around. There wasn’t really an “ah”moment right off the bat but boy did I bite my words once arriving gin Galway. It is nothing and I do mean absolutely nothing like Indiana. There were pubs on every corner and no matter how hard you tried a Guinness sign was always in sight. By the way incase you were unaware a pub is not synonymous with restaurant in Ireland…but it’s a pub. For some reason that didn’t click with me until my last few days in Ireland.

Fast-forward to the night…we walk into the pub sit down and I immediately know what I want-fish and chips. DELISHIOUS. Best fish and chips I have ever had…well aside from the fact it might have been the only time id had fish and chips. Then my bulmers came. Bulmers tastes almost like apple juice with sprite that is spiked with some sort of cider alcohol. Lauren said they have something similar in the states but in Ireland it’s better. I tried Guinness the same night and while I am the furthest thing from a beer drinker it wasn’t too bad. It didn’t have me rushing to the nearest glass of water to rinse out the awful after taste you often find with a bud light. The other drink I came to love was a called a snakebite. It consisted of bulmers, a splash of beer, and a little fruity alcohol called blackcurrant…these little beggars will sneak up on you!

Paying for drinks later in the evening was where I noticed another difference. My purse was gradually getting heavier and heavier and I couldn’t understand why. I then realized I had about 12 euro in change rolling around. I didn’t really realize that a 2-euro coin was just as valuable so I kept throwing them into my bag. However, I loved paying for some drinks in coins because it was such a foreign feeling I felt like I wasn’t spending money.

The other difference I noticed was the men in Ireland. Not always but I feel some bars or clubs in America tend to be a waterhole for single people looking to have a good time and maybe get a little lucky-just base of off some experience I have had. Pubs in Ireland on the other hand are not as centered on meeting a mate but more mingling and talking. It was fun people watching and having the bartender know a lot of the customers by name. There was no random couple making out in the corner and there was certainly no grinding or provocative dancing. It was quite refreshing sitting at a bar and just talking with a whole bunch of random strangers.

Lauren was a fantastic tour guide. I got to see a variety of places within Ireland (which ill eventually blog about individually) but I didn’t feel worn out. We saw Connemara and the Kylemore Abbey, Cliffs of Moher, a variety of castles…my favorite being a fairytale castle and the Blarney Castle, then on our final day we roamed around the Temple Bar area doing a food crawl. We got to eat out at a lot of different pubs and cafes and tried a lot of yummy new foods. One interesting aspect about pubs in Ireland is the age difference among the patrons. The bars I’ve been to in Boston (granted it’s a scarce amount) are generally one age group. In Ireland there were people younger than me mingling with people who reminded me of my grandpa.

This post could go on for hours and my guess is with the other “what I did in Ireland” posts to come it will be hours so ill leave you with some of my favorite sayings of the week. Granted they are not all Irish themed but they definitely gave Lauren and I a good laugh. “Cheeky Bastard” was an hourly occurrence. “Rubbish.” ”Blyme.” “Two Bulmers please” was said commonly. “Cheerio” (not the cereal.) “Cheers.” “Slanche.” And my very favorite saved for last, mainly due to its relevance, it was semi relatable and incredibly hilarious…“He about leaked his knickers.“

Fantastical Faceless Friday Photos!

2011-03-04T19:59:00.004-05:00

These are some pictures I have taken of my favorite places I have visited so far...can you guess where they are?! :)

An Unusual Favorite.

2011-02-15T22:03:00.022-05:00

For those of you who know me fairly well its no secret that Valentine's Day is my favorite holiday.Yes, you read correctly-favorite. I am endlessly made fun of for it too. I enjoy it more than my Birthday, Christmas, and Thanksgiving... maybe even combined. Now, before you let out an exasperated and cynical sigh hear (read?) me out. I'm not hitched so it has nothing to do with getting gifts. I'm not some huge sap who melts at the sight of fluttery red and pink hearts or Justin Bieber lyrics. No, I love Valentines for two reasons-the chaos it ensues and the collective act of selflessness it encompasses.

My parents own a flower shop and I go home every year, rain, snow, hail, tornado, or meteor shower...nothing can stop me from working on Valentine's Day. The phones are constantly ringing, the arranging of flowers is endless, directing the 5 delivery drivers to the hundreds of various delivery spots is more intricate than stinking circulatory flow charts, etc. There is a constant rush pulsing through my body, which for those of you who me well, know I thrive one this kind of rush. But what makes it so so worth it, is all the ridiculous questions and card messages I hear and see. My favorite question this year, which I was shocked to be asked on numerous occasions, was “will the flowers be pretty?” My initial reaction is to laugh and ask "are you freaking kidding me?" followed with the most cynical response I can only long to say...“Actually no sir, we do incredibly ugly arrangements here and I was thinking a nice brown and rotting one would be perfect for you. Normally flowers smell great but Ill be sure these smell horrid just to make your hunny feel extra special.” But of course I simply say “Oh yes, very beautiful!” I chalk it up to men,our main clientele on Valentines, are just being men and forget till they see the massive "Don't forget Valentines!" sign hanging outside our door. They know the bear minimum about flowers and assume its better to receive confirmation from the florist herself that the flowers will, in fact, be pretty. (Sorry guys)

We had some interesting cards this year. My two favorite were actually quite sweet. One guy asked his girlfriend to marry him. He filled out the card "Will you marry me? Check yes, no maybe." Another bought his girlfriend a ticket to go on a cruise with the card message reading "you need a bathing suit...were going to MEXICO!" I like these creative cards more than the "Happy Valentine's Day. Love ya." ...maybe I am somewhat of a sap?

However, all silly cynical customer service and adrenaline junky-ness aside...I really love what Valentines stands for. I don't know the full extent of Valentines history but know some of it is centered around secret

marriages, forbidden love, prison, etc. Real romantic stuff. I love Valentines because in the span of about 72 hours I see hundreds of doting husbands, boyfriends, girlfriends, wives, explicitly loving one another in front of the entire world. If your one of those people who is thinking "shouldnt they show their love every day?" "Valentines is a hallmark holiday" ...you hold some validity but sorry I say screw you. Some people call Valentine's day a selfish holiday but I think its the opposite. The majority of our customers are coming in to order flowers for their significant other because they know how happy and encouraged it will make them feel, not out of obligation. With that said...showing your love everyday is always a nice gesture.

While I don't agree with those who think "Happy Valentine's Day" is an interchangeable phrase with "Happy Singles Awareness Day", I am sympathetic. I can fully understand it exploits the fact that you don't have

a significant other, but I think those people are closed minded. Valentines is not merely between romantic-intimate relationships, its about sharing your love with anyone. A vast majority of our orders are from parents to their kids, dads coming in to get a single pink rose for their 2 year old daughter. I can guarantee that single rose will make that 2 year old girl feel like mommy and daddy's little princess.

I am fully aware that working in a florist shop for 6 years and having a flower shop be your families sole source of income can make one grossly biased. However, I really love flowers. I love that they can make an excruciatingly sad occasion a tad less sad, I love the fact they bring beauty to an already beautiful and happy event, I love that they can instantly make someones day go from drab to splendid, but what I love most are the simple "just because" flowers. It is a way to encourage and lift someone up...a truly unselfish, loving, and considerate act. So, to my cute little blog readers...Happy late Valentines Day!

(Me and my sister, Abbey, at the shop.)

Am I really posting this?...

2011-02-07T14:55:00.006-05:00

I am in such a good mood. This week has been such a positive and uplifting week and its only getting better. However, that's not the point of this post. If you watch Greys Anatomy you'll know that the characters will "dance it out" if they had a stressful day or are tense, etc. See below...

So! This brings me to present time...studying for my first Neurophysiology exam. I feel really good about it but I was also feeling like I needed to jazz up my afternoon, even if it was for a few minutes, so I could study harder. I decided to take a break and well...just look.

Believe me, I am fully aware of how incredibly goofy and ridiculous I look...but nonetheless, I felt like my head was ready for more studying! It was actually alarmingly euphoric...I was even more chipper than before! Plus, I believe this crosses one of those New Years Resolutions off my list!

Fantasitcal Friday Faceless Photos

2011-02-03T18:17:00.005-05:00

Happy Weekend!

Swimming in an open ocean.

2011-02-01T15:17:00.007-05:00

My intention for this blog has never been to be super serious or have a plethora of insightful thoughts. However, this particular post may contain more "heavy-ness" than previous ones. Mainly because right now an amazingly fantastical transition is going on and I'm extraordinarily excited about it.

I've never been a super religious person but definitely a spiritual one, and yes I do believe there is a difference for me, and really for every individual. I see religion as a way to redemption. I find it to be more structured/organized, more traditional, more routine and ritualistic (I hope that's a word?). Spirituality on the other hand, is the driving force behind believing what I believe. For me its a more personal and unique experience. I think you can have a God or a greater power in both and it varies depending on the individual. I find a lot of my peace and joy in nature and (currently) Starbucks. I find a lot of my belief in God in nature and in science. Of all the science related classes Ive encountered I find myself asking questions like how is it possible this little microscopic life form just sporadically appeared and these molecular processes just happen? Living in Colorado I looked at the mountains that encompassed my life and wondered how anything other than something bigger could create them. I believe in maturation, evolution, progression etc, and to each his own, but this nature/science thinking is where I personally find my belief of God.

A great deal of my time spent in my prayer journal is asking questions, challenging ideas or messages I have previously been taught, asking for help, seeking comfort, etc. I can confidently say much of my church experience or searching for God can be summed up into one word -confusing! That is until now. Don't misread that last sentence- I have by no means nearly figured everything out, but I've also never felt this connected. I feel like God has removed a lot of my safety rafts in order to leave me swimming in an open ocean with him as my only lifeboat. My safety rafts being friends/family, open ocean being life and God as my lifeboat. Fun analogy ey? Rather than feeling lost or lonely I feel peaceful, comforted, enlightened and utterly blissful!

This all comes full circle in my prayer journal and one particular book "Walking with God" by John Eldredge. I realize there is a chance I may be biased to this book because John Eldredge is from the wonderful state of CO:) This book is a little out there at times for my taste. It has moments where the narrator literally hears God speak and tell him to hunt or not, to read or not, etc, which I have never experienced...but the underlining message(s) are fabulous. Here are some of my favorite lines:

"Don't let your experience of God up to this point limit what you might enjoy with him in the coming years."

"Let go of the pressure that says you have to hear from him right now or things are not right between you."

"The first major awakening in our journey of faith is coming to realize that God exists. It can be quite a jolt"

"It causes you to mature, for you have to be intentional and deal with assaults directly. No more dodging. I want to stop avoiding disruption"

"When it comes to crisis or events that really upset us, this I have learned: you can have God or you can have understanding. Sometimes you can have both. But if you insist on understanding, it often doesn't come. And that can create distance between you and God, because you are upset and demanding an explanation in order to move on, but the explanation isn't coming, and so you withdraw a bit from God and lose the grace God is giving. He doesn't explain everything. But he always offers us himself."

"I felt that life was up to me (that was my wounding). I resolved to live life though it were up to me"

I could go into great detail as to what each of these particular quotes means to me but that's a much longer post. I hope I'm not coming off as being this uber spiritual believer because believe me I have my reservations, my questions, my challenges, etc. All in all...Its especially comforting personally to know and believe that there is someone else planning and helping me through the vast ocean of life, always there waiting and willing to offer me the lifeboat. It is quite exhilarating!

"Cookies make me happy"

2011-01-28T14:44:00.006-05:00

I nannied for the most wonderful people/family last semester and go back about once a week or so to give the parents a break and to earn some extra cash. However, Id do it for free because the kids are fabulous--just dont tell. It took some time to reign "CR" in but he finally knows my rules ;)

This morning I walk in asking the question I always ask...
Me: What are we doing today?
CR: Well moms at the beach and left us the kitchen. So were making cookies.
Me: Oh we are, are we? whys that?
CR: because cookies make me happy and I want to be happy all day.

...a kid after my own heart :p

The finished product! Our hands were far too messy to take pictures during our making but it was quite fun!

Then baby C woke up from her morning nap and joined us!

CR wanted to take some pictures :)

I absolutely love this family and it has been such a blessing seeing Baby C learn to crawl, growl and now blow raspberries. Or watching CR be this shy little munchkin to the loudest most active and imaginative little man ever. I feel so grateful to the parents for letting me get my kid fix and borrow theirs from time to time. Lucky lucky me!

Lifes Unexpected Blessings.

2011-01-23T00:11:00.008-05:00

This next sentence may sound dramatic but I promise it is true to a certain degree. When things go awry boy do they go awry! I wont go into the nitty gritty details because they are not that important...However, it started with some of the most awful news from my father on Monday followed by a slew of other situations throughout the week. Years ago, when I would feel overwhelmed by life I'd do something impulsive (i.e. drop everything and move to Colorado) However, I have found a new outlet that is a million times more productive and a million times cheaper!

I've never been extraordinarily confident in my writing, but I've journaled since I was 12...and still have said journals. In the past two months or so I have kicked it up a notch and started a prayer journal. I've never felt more at peace in such chaotic times. My prayer journal is new, its exciting, its complicated, its oddly uncomfortable while feeling natural at times, its cathartic, and ultimately its perfection. Not that my writing is perfection, but the fact I can sit anywhere, talk to God about anything, feel like its productive, and leave feeling peaceful and positive, is perfection.

So, point being... For anyone who feels overwhelmed, stressed, uncertain, or excited, joyful, or sunny...a journal, prayer based or not, can always be handy! And if not...just have a fabulous nanny family that says be here at 6 and you walk in to the most adorable, fabulous, loving, insane, fun, goofy, 3 year old boy holding this...

(Coffee ice cream with caramel, chocolate, whipped cream and a smile)

Inspiration

2011-01-19T22:44:00.002-05:00

I need to come up with better titles...but bear with me while my creativity is momentarily off par. As for this specific post I think the pictures say it all without my added commentary... but I do hope they inspire you some. :)

photo credits: http://icecreamisbetterwithafork.tumblr.com/

Lost and Found.

2011-01-12T16:33:00.010-05:00

(Im posting two in one day for 2 reasons. One im snowed in and so utterly bored and 2 Lauren peer pressured me via skype.)

I love cards, especially random "because its Tuesday" or "you popped into my mind" or "just because" cards. I think it all is rooted in my childhood. I can vividly remember my dad leaving my mom post it notes with cute little messages hidden in the most odd places of the house. I can remember learning to read, and rather than a standard Doctor Seuss or ABC book, it was a card my dad had written me. This obsession with cards only progressed when I started working at the flower shop and got to see a plethora of cards every day. My favorite were always the ones that made no sense to me but made perfect sense to the couple involved. I always thought those cards had something far more special and sincere than the typical "i love you" or "thinking of you" cards.

When I moved a few weeks ago I found a shoe box of cards I had kept. It was the holy grail of cards. I had a few from my parents, best friend, a few notes from middle school folded into that obnoxious little triangle that I couldn't fold today to save my life, some from past relationships, and some from people who are no longer around.

Here are some of my favorite lines...

"You're the person I text in the bathroom stall when someone does something funny in the stall next to me."

"I realize how fun it was to hang out with the two most NASTIEST (B-town term) people ever with no school and a load of mountain dew and food."

"Love you baby girl. I am so very proud of you and how much you have grown up these past few years. I hope you have an incredible time at school. Don't let the books get in the way of your education and remember to always take the risk."

"Happy Birthday Sis, now that youre moving can I have your car?"

"Wait! You slam-a-jamed the tiger? What about hunk-a-dory-ing the lion?"

me: "Seriously? well, we have to get some before"

ash: "Seriously...ya definitely we can skip tomorrow??.

Mr. Nelson: "Seriously, stop writing notes in my class. See you at 3 for detention."

"Roses are red, violets are blue, I get so happy, when I think of you. I love how corny that is!"

"I miss the way you crack all your fingers, followed by your shoulders, neck and then back."

...I remember finding this note in my lunch every Friday until high school..."Have a wonderful day at school! Love you!"

"Sis, I hope you have an awesome 16th birthday. I hope you know that when you babysit me and I get up after you tuck me into bed, I'm not pushing my bedtime back, but I really have to pee..."

"Really. Its always been you Rach."

"I cant wait for you to come HOME to Boston and we can snuggle, and listen to Backstreet Boys and Nsync and have little debs bring us food in bed."

M: "want to go to the soccer game on Friday?"

me"no"

M: "Why?"

me"your kinda odd."

M: "how about the football game?"

me "take a hint kid!"

"Just wanted you to know I'm praying...take your time, ask, ask, ask as many questions as you can think of, and enjoy the ride!"

"Love, Your very own Mr. Darcy"

Cooped up on a snow day!

2011-01-12T15:17:00.006-05:00

Being snowed in I must say is quite fun but insanely boring when your roommate gets snowed in elsewhere...so! In light of said boredom I compiled a mosh posh of pictures...

I'm really grateful for my family including all the insanity they bring in tow.

I miss...

My favorite movies are currently...

I love the following people more than this blog could ever convey....

I could eat the following everyday, all day, twice a day....

I want nothing more than...

Slowing Down

2011-01-10T17:01:00.007-05:00

I write this post as I'm on a train coming home from Newburyport I spent an entire weekend with one of my first school friends who I've (surprisingly) kept in touch with through all my moves! We spent the weekend shopping, playing in the snow with two fabulous black labs, shucking shrimp,etc! I outline this all because for anyone that knows me, I'd assume they'd agree when I say I don't stop. I can think of a million and one things I should have been accomplishing this weekend. Organize my school supplies, finish setting up my new apartment, ordering next semesters books, run, do laundry, clean out the grotesque fridge...the list goes on and on. I fill each day with so much stuff, even if it as simple as watching a movie, so that I don't have to think. I mastered this when I lived in Colorado.

I surrounded myself with an array of people, countless hiking trips, endless hours of work and studying, topped off with a few hours of restless sleep. Don't get me wrong I think everything I listed is perfectly acceptable in moderation, however I'd argue I missed a lot of things by going so fast. I'd say I began to feel guilty and irresponsible if I wasn't doing something productive 24/7.

This train ride alone to Newburyport has forced me to stop. I packed at 130am last Friday and forgot both a book and an ipod, so I'm left with nothing but my thoughts...an excruciatingly frightful thought. This pushing is such a way of life for me, I barely know how to survive otherwise. I'm constantly working to try and control my life and the certain outcomes of particular situations. I heave myself at life consistently looking for ways to make things precisely the way I want them. Again, not a horrible quality, Ill defend myself and say that some action does need to be taken in our own lives, but I'm trying (or tried) to control everything.

There are particular forces driving the reasons behind why I live this way. I know exactly why I'm striving and pushing. It stems from not wanting to believe or deal, and a fear that my life is all up to me. I've got this mentality at times to get so far ahead before the floor falls out from underneath me. Its awful. Not only do I set myself up for failure but I leave no room for error. Its odd because I'm typically a very go with the flow type person...I can pretty much pin-point the 3-3.5 years where I felt like I had no control over a particular relationship and so I over compensated with controlling work, and school, and money, etc.

This has all changed in the last month to two months. I've not only realized but truly accepted the fact there is utterly no possible way I can control everything, and I don't really want or feel the need to anymore. I think I've looked to God to guide me to the right situations (new apt) and decisions (job...) And trust hell plan for me. I have to admit, I've never felt less stressed when normally I'd feel immensely overwhelmed right now. Its pretty stinking liberating!

This comes full circle with Newburyport and the title of this particular post. I almost didn't come on this trip. I was skeptical about spending money with no steady income and felt I should spend the weekend walking into every possible store asking if they were hiring. However, i decided to go. I can't tell you how happy I am that I did. Not only was it a wonderful weekend away in nature which I absolutely adore, but its a way to reconnect with my friend from college and build a better friendship, something that no job can replace.

**The pictures are from Point Lookout resort in Maine...its where my friends sister is getting married in Aug...and its BEAUTIFUL!**

Ireland Bound!

2011-01-06T12:27:00.006-05:00

I could possibly have had a better morning and I had to blog about it. Here is the play by play...

9 am-- I woke up to one of my very best friends who I rarely see.

10 am-- I have been looking and holding out for the perfect job medically related...and have been avidly praying that something will come through. This morning I got a call from Childrens Hospital in Boston. NOTHING is a done deal yet, but the fact that I got through the first round of interviews was so encouraging. So everyone, keep your fingers crossed and keep praying that I get this job!

10:30 am-- I skyped with my very best friend who is studying abroad in Ireland. Just seeing her cute little face, and hearing how much fun she is having and how different everything is there was really neat and encouraging. I really wanted to visit her and was just skeptical because of financial issues, feeling like spending almost 650 on a plane ticket alone was too much...however...

11:00 am--I BOOKED A TICKET FOR LESS THAN 450 TO IRELAND FOR 9 DAYS! ...and two AMAZING perks...one-I have a 6 hour layover in the only city I have ever wanted to kill to visit...PARIS! I plan on leaving the airport even if it is for 2o minutes, even if I have to stand through 2 hours of security again, just to touch Paris! AND two...ill be in Ireland on St Patricks day!! Hello Beer, Fish and Chips, Blue skies, and Greeeeen waters! :)

I feel so encouraged and uplifted and unstoppable. I'm on such a happy high right now I cannot even explain it!

Hope everyone else out there is having a splendid morning!

I had to do it...

2011-01-03T22:33:00.029-05:00

Well I feel there is some what no point to a blog if I don't write some cliche new years resolution post...so here we go!

UN- Make new friends and really try to put myself out there with new people...I want to make these new friends without the expectations of them disappointing me.

DEUX- Learn AND memorize how to make the perfect pie and lasagna from scratch including the crust(pie..duh) and possibly noodles!

TROIS- Id like to be fit and live a healthier lifestyle.

QUATRE- Go to Ireland to see the my best gal friend! laureno! :)

CINQ-Grow deeper in my relationships with friends, family, and cute little madigans.

SIX- Learn better French...hence the counting mechanism of this particular blog.

SEPT- Increase my pathetic movie collection without spending an ungodly amount of money.

HUIT- Perform more random acts of kindness...if possible every day...even if that means flipping penny over, heads up, for someone else to find.

NEUF- Jump as far and often as possible out of my comfort zone.

DIX- Learn to dance...in like a ballroom cute swaying type way...AND have the guts to dance in public...anytime...anywhere.

ONZE- Build a time capsule or a letter...to open in a few years. Fill it with all my wants, needs, current passions.

DOUZE- Make straight As this semester...aka...work my bum off without losing the motivation.

QUATORZE- Relax.

I think this is my most important and relevant resolution. Therefore, I refuse to limit it to 2011 alone. This is my lifelong resolution. There is one particular "thing" I've actively tried to push away for the better part of my teen and adult life. My plan is to vigorously strive to trust, love, understand, search and believe in this particular mystery thing. (My mystery "thing" is probably far more obvious than I assume...)

1950s Suzie Homemaker.

2010-12-18T10:44:00.008-05:00

I am so excited for Christmas, and while I generally do not dwell on what I am getting, this year I must say there is one gift I cannot wait to get! It is positively the most adorable but practical apron ever. (Insert "women" jokes here...) I love cooking, more so baking and deserts than anything, but still I needed a comfy and adorable apron! My mom says its what her mom would have worn in the 1950s-hence the blog title.

I have always been obsessed with silly kitchen appliances. I think there is nothing better than a cherry pitter that doesn't pit 1 but 4 cherries at one time! Or measuring cups that not only fit within one another, but f

old flat. Oh, and the very best...color coded chopping boards. Seriously, my amazon wish list is basically 2 pages of kitchen appliances.

While most girls dream about their perfect

house, I dream about my perfect kitchen. I want an island, wood cabinets, a double sink with no divider, plenty of pantry and shelf space, all gas appliances, preferably black counter tops, and a table that will seat at least 6. I think I secretly (well not so secretly after this post goes viral) want my kitchen to looks something like this...

I think this screams perfection, and its not even a picture of the full kitchen. Im loving my life as a poor college student, living in random apartments, and moving all the time, but I must confess when I get MY very own kitchen that I don't have to share, and can organize how I want, I wont be missing my rinky-dink college kitchens.

Also, for the record, me and my new apron will be making some delicious pies, and cakes, and cupcakes, and Popsicles, maybe some pizzas, and pastas, and chickens....oh the endless possibilities!!

Theres a beauty in walking away.

2010-12-14T12:53:00.006-05:00

In my last blog I said there has not been much in the past few months that has been blog worthy...that was kinda a lie. Well not a lie because nothing seems as worthy as little Madi. Anyways, the biggest change in my life is I have finally made the venture back to Boston for school-nursing school. Its been very bitter sweet. In Colorado, I was not only incredibly independent but it was the most peaceful place I could and still can ever imagine. I lived about 30 minutes away from the Rocky Mountains and within 5-10 minutes could easily hike my choice of trails. My favorite was Chautauqua. Hiking in this particular park was breathtaking and spectacular. There were a variety of rocky dunes, meadows full of colorful wildflowers, trails I swear would wander for miles on end, even flat sheer rock that you could latch into and climb.

I would say I went out hiking or climbing anywhere from 3-4 times a week even more when it was summer. Hiking was a way to not only exude energy, but it cleared my head. It is a few hours of complete silence (other than the leaves in the wind, chirping birds, etc) where I was alone. It is possibly the most liberated feeling I have ever encountered in my life. Seems dramatic but I promise its true! However, living in boston the closest I have come to a mountain and complete serenity is a mountain of stairs in an empty building :) Thats not entirely true. I have the most fantastical boyfriend who took me on a spontaneous hiking adventure after church one day. Since then my outlook on Boston has done a 180....Im finding beauty and serenity in places or things I didn't really recognize before.

I must admit, I may have been morning the loss of my Colorado

mountains which has skewed my view of Boston. And while there

may not be mountains in my backyard here, there are adventures in

Boston that I would have never been able to experience in Boulder.

Skyline Park (the picture on the side) is my current favorite place here.

It is a simple park, but seriously how amazing is that view of the city!!

Another aspect I love about Boston...the fact my car was frozen shut this morning before school.

So awesome. Anyways, Im starting to find a lot in and about Boston that I love, and

being closer to my friends and family highly outweighs any mountain. All in all, I have found the beauty

in walking away from Colorado, and it will always be there for me to visit. :)

A new reason to blog...

2010-12-13T18:26:00.006-05:00

I havent blogged in over a year! Yikes...In my defense, I have not really had enough that I have felt is blog worthy (other than moving cross country again, changing majors again, switching schools again...). However! That all changed December 7th! My cute little peanut of a neice was born on December 7th, 5lbs 6oz, and 20 inches long. Madilynn Renee Wood is easily the smallest baby I have not only seen, but held.

I nannied in Boulder and had little Gussy for over a year and a half, and of course loved him. I did not think my love for a child could have exceeded what I felt for Gussy, but Madi has taken the cake! (Sorry Gus) It is odd, she is almost a week old and I can see such a little personality in her already. Im sure as I continue to watch her grow up her personality will continue to become more and more unique, only making my love for the little peanut grow. It is quite unfathomable

how such a tiny, new, adorable baby can make my day! :)

I have always worked really hard at school, work, etc, and none of it really comes naturally to me. I have to intently study in order to do well on a test. It took me months to learn how to

arrange flowers. When I worked at the bar memorizing the drink recipes took me a lifetime. However, I have a natural motherly instinct (not to toot my own horn though!) and really am excellent at taking care of kids. I realize its not rocket science, or nursing in my case :), but I definite

ly think it is something to be proud of! I LOVED my job in Colorado. I thought it was so fun managing 3 kids schedules, taking them to various activities, playing silly make believe games, all while doing laundry, cooking dinner, and running errands. Real womanly stuff.

My mom (who is staying her btw for a month or so to help with the baby) told me when I was a kid anytime someone would ask me what I want to

be when I grow up, I instantly replied "a mommy." Seeing Madi, and all my nannying had made me feel confident that one day, when I do have my own children, I will be able to provide and care for them without getting utterly overwhelmed.

Sky Coaster Take 3

2009-07-31T21:33:00.010-04:00

In the last 2 days i have spent 20 hours at Kentucky Kingdom Six Flags :) Now nothing can beat Six Flags New England but this was very close! The line were so short they let us stay on one ride 8 consecutive times...grease lightning. You were strapped in and shot off into a loop and straight into the air, then went backwards through the loop and back into the air...8 times. So amazing. Another ride we went on multiple times was tornado, and i think this could have been my favorite ride ever (other than superman)... you start off in water and swim to the tub, then once in the tube you are dropped about 50 feet at close to a 90 degree angle and into a funnel that spins and throws you up against the wall...needless to say SO fun. However the best of them all was the Sky Coaster which somewhat simulated skydiving (hopefully something ill be blogging SOON ;) anyways Abbey me and my father were strapped into stray jacket type things and then hoisted 187 feet into the air. The guy that worked it said that it was the second tallest in America, the first being one in Florida which my dad and i had already been on. Anyways so 187 feet into the air then 3...2...1..go! and i had to pull the lever that plummeted us into the ground and back again, kind of like a huge swing.

Therefore in spite of this wonderful experience i have made it my mission to ride the following roller coasters before i die... i know somewhat cheesy and cliche but still thrilling! here they are...anyone want to come along!

Kingda Ka
Jackson Township, New Jersey
Top Thrill Dragster
Sandusky, Ohio
Millennium Force
Sandusky, Ohio
Goliath
Valencia, California
Superman: The Escape
Valencia, California
Son of Beast
Mason, Ohio
El Toro
Jackson Township, New Jersey

So all in all ill be spending my next few summers in Cambodia, New Jersey, Ohio and California...right after i win the lottery :)

Phnom Penh, Cambodia Here I COME!!

2009-07-11T12:39:00.011-04:00

When I was a kid I had a really good friend, Hilary Gumely, and when I was like 9ish she moved to Cambodia with her family...permanently. Ever since then I have always had some sort of fascination with Cambodia, but it wasn't till about a year ago that I was determined to travel abroad and live in Cambodia.

The summer before my freshman year in college I received my summer reading assignment, Lucky Child, needless to say I was less than enthused to spend my hot summer days reading a, what i thought would be a dry and utterly boring book. However I was enthralled with everything in the book, from the style of writing, the descriptive nature of the text, even the explicit pictures throughout the pages...Quick little synopsis of the book...Two sisters get separated during the Kumar Rouge in Cambodia, one escapes to the states the other is a prisoner in her own country...all in all two VERY different life experiences. But what was more interesting about the book was the vast cultural differences between America and Cambodia, something I too hope to experience...hence the title of this blog! Come summer of next year I have decided to take off 3 weeks and travel to Cambodia with "A Broader View" volunteer program. IM SO EXCITED! nothing is finalized yet (aka i haven't paid yet lol but SOON!)

Its a very well planned out program. Most days ill be at the orphanage but the program also provides a few "free" days where i can go sightseeing!

The program I'll be apart of is technically called- Orphanage and Child Care Assistant meaning tutoring, cooking, playing, and teaching English! The orphanage provides a home and education to over 100 children, which I thought was surprisingly low. From my understanding most of the children previously worked as garbage pickers at a landfill in Phnom Penh.

I don't think this could be a better opportunity for me, just as a future teacher but also just as a person...I'm hoping it will be a fun and humbling experience! ...who knows maybe ill never come back:)

The Wood Gals :)

2009-07-07T16:30:00.013-04:00

I think that it is interesting how, as a family, we grow and become closer by the activities, tragedies, laughter and fantastical times we encounter. For instance, the majority of Benjamin and Becky’s vacation here in North Carolina was full of fun and laughter, but I also cried harder and longer with Becky, than I ever have in front of anyone else, and although the circumstances of the crying still suck, I feel that it brought us so much closer. One of my favorite things about Becky is our “woodette-code” or “sister-code”. It goes without saying the “sister-code” is a code of secrecy and I know no matter what I say or how honest I am, Becky is never going to judge or hate me, which is the best feeling in the world and i would go as far to say she is the only person i feel this with(well Lauren too.). I cant think of any other person that has gone through things Becky has gone through and who still has such a strong faith in God and in people. As much as it amazes me I still find it incomprehensible. anyways Becky I love you and am so lucky that you are apart of our family and my life :)

Another person i am so greatful for in sad times is Smelly, or as many others know her, Abbey, my baby sister. Through this past week she was everything a pain, adorable, annoying, funny, comforting, etc. When my "crapppppy" situation happened abbey did everythingg she could to make me happy, rubbed lotion on my arms because it "makes you feel good", she brought me diet cokes, she even crawled into bed to rub my back when i could hardly move, even had a good attitude about all the pranks!! I realize she is only 11 and cant really understand the exact things i am going through but everything she did and said was so perfect and really did make me so much more happy. Another attribute of Smelly that i love is her candidness. My dad always said think before you speak, well that life-lesson is beyond Smelly, she says what the truth even if its not what you want to hear. She is so honest and the most hysterical child i have ever encountered. I cant wait for her to grow up and get in a crappy situation so i can crawl in her bed and rub her back! :) Love you Smelly.

The last but certainly not least Wood is the WOMAN, or my mom! The only people who read this silly blog know we never got along until i moved out of the house...and thank God i did! I have never been happier with the status of our relationship as i am now. She goes above and beyond to make me happy (PM medicine to knock me out...amen to that!) but just little things she does, like bake my 4Th of July cake and breakfast casserole or scratch my back when I'm pathetically crying on the bathroom floor ha ha :D... overall i think that it is just comforting to know that my mother truly does love me and want the best for me. I think it is comforting that she knows i will make mistakes and will be a crazy indecisive child, but she still loves and supports my every decision. Love ya mama!

All in all i think its needless to say I love the wood gals :)

Lifes Simple Pleasures

2009-06-29T15:30:00.009-04:00

Everyday i find myself doing a variety of things, working, taking care of children, then picking up after them, cooking dinner, not to mention life's fun surprises, a death, a birth, a broken bone, car accident, traffic ticket...etc. However, when i come across those "simple pleasures" i cant help but smile! I love mail, i think there is something so fun about getting a letter or package and not knowing whats inside or what the piece of paper holds until you open it! not to mention that it is solely for me and i can either choose to show or not show whoever i want, its like my own fun little mystery!

Anyways, i decided to go through my day today and keep in mind all the simple pleasures that i came across...so here they are!

when the right song comes on at the perfect moment
watching someone im walking with tripp :)
pull through parking spots or when i PERFECTLY parallel park
when i have a good idea and make it work
the smell of my flower shop
The look on Ella and Ace's face when they get something i am explaining
laughing so hard you get awesome abs
laying by the pool wearing sunglasses so you can see people but they cant see you're staring (kinda creepy i know)
holding hands (these next two didn't really happen today, but i was thinking about when it did so they can stay on the list.)
kisses on the forehead
the silly kid questions i get
letters or packages--not bills
finding the perfect peach
when things go exactly how i plan
when things go the exact opposite of how i planned BUT they still work out in the end
good book
taking a flower order in FRENCH! wahoo me

AND ITS NOT EVEN NOON!!

I am no longer going through the motions of life. i realize there is a lot more than just waking up, going to school, working, and sleeping...there is mail :)

WWJD??

2009-06-29T13:57:00.008-04:00

Recently I have been playing with the idea of studying the bible, more so to learn what everything is about. My mindset has always been that in order for me to commit to that process and feel Gods power, or whatever, I have to act like God would want me to act...hence the What Would Jesus Do title :). To some extent this is in fact true, turn the other cheek,treat others how I want to be treated, eye for eye tooth, etc. However, something has sort of in a sense clicked. It's not merely taking actions and living how i would think God would want me to through my daily life, but thinking (whether its a possibility or not) that God has something planned. To clarify I see life's misfortunes, uncertainties, afflictions, sufferings, whatever, as God punishing me (bad i know). The easiest example that comes to mind is North Carolina. My family moved here for the church, no other real reason, yet to this day my family has not been happy, even content, with any church for the past 5 years. Normally I take this as a slap in the face from God, kinda like he is messing with my life, again bad I know. However, I'm realizing that my parents don't view it like this at all, they view it as God working a plan that is beyond anything they can comprehend...I'm honestly still struggling with how they could have such strong faith and trust but nonetheless they do. When i am feeling like pain or misfortune I get selfish and blame God for making me suffer rather than see it as a learning experience to make me a stronger person. So back to the "clicking"- I think it would be good for me to think that god does have something planned rather than just being bitter and angry with god. Something possible that seems impossible, ay! I think for anyone this may be hard to carry out on a daily basis. By that i mean thinking that God is constantly in control and constantly does have something up his, metaphorical, sleeve. :)

I came across a quote in this book I'm reading..."It is doubtful whether God can bless a man greatly until he has hurt him deeply." A.W. Tozer. In one sense I'm cynical thinking why hurt me at all just bless me. In another sense it makes total sense..oh sense :) i think especially for me I need to see and feel Gods power or plan before i can jump in...but I'm trying to have the attitude and mind set that if i need to suffer in order to see or believe bring it on...And to be honest with my self, and whoever else wastes their time reading this :), I don't exactly know why all of a sudden my view and attitude has changed from very pessimistic to very optimistic. In addition, knowing me its bound to change a trillion and one times, but for now I cant say i hate this optimistic view!

I think when I am feeling overwhelmed or confused or just uncertain, I have a three step reaction process.

resentment
isolation/pushing people away
I doubt everything I once believed was true

However! I believe that I am starting, at least trying, to realize that the most incredibly horrid place on the planet to be when I am doubting stuff-is alone. But you know what they say... better late then never :)

All in all I think I am coming to the recognition of a few things. A. I need not only to act how God would want me to act but also think and try to believe that he is doing what is best for me, whether or not it seems so. B. my life at the moment isn't going to get easier, and rather than being resentful, isolated, and doubtful, I need to suck it up buttercup and truck on through! and lastly C. I , and I would think others, avoid the truth when it is painful and hard, but nonetheless I cant avoid it any longer!

Quote of the Moment:
"Scepticism is the beginning of Faith"
Oscar Wilde

"I want some cheap flowers for my wife..."

2009-06-16T20:27:00.003-04:00

After working an 8 hour day alone at my flower shop I was inspired to write a fun blog about the idiotic and down right dumb customers i see on a weekly basis...

Every day for the past four and a half years I have asked myself, “Why am I still working here?” Granted in the past one year i haven't worked nearly as much, at least in the customer service aspect of the store but nonetheless i have been working for my parents shop for almost a full five years. Do you know what type of people order, receive, deliver, grow, or wholesale flowers? I do...

On any particular day I find myself wondering how it is possible for so many people to act with such ignorance, incompetence, and pathetic desperation at the same time they are also wanting to do a “good deed.” For instance, I remember a time when I tried to wire a floral order to an out-of-town florist for a frequent customer of ours. The order was for an arrangement of flowers for $40.00, with no special flowers identified. Within ten minutes I received a “reply” message that stated, “We are unable to fill this order.” I called for clarification and the filling florist shop owner explained, “We have no flowers.” Incredulously, I asked, “You are a flower shop, aren’t you?”

“Oh yes,” she sweetly replied.

“You’re a flower shop, but you have no flowers,” I asked with confusion.

“Yes, that’s right dear.”

Oh jeeze! Can someone explain to me how you can call yourself a “flower shop” but have no flowers? Are there auto parts stores that have no parts for cars? Or clothing stores that don’t sell clothes? I dont think so!...get some fricking flowers.

I love it when the phone rings and someone says, “Hello, I would like to send flowers. Do you deliver?

“Yes sir, we do.”

I spend three or four minutes gathering his billing information, what he wants a card message to read, what he wants to send, and then to whom he wishes to send the flowers.

“And her address, sir?”

“Oh, I don’t know where she lives.”

I mean, really!? What does he think, that I know where she lives, or that the delivery driver knows all the names and addresses of Durham County residents?

In the years I have worked with my parents, I have received at least a dozen calls similar to this:

“I received a beautiful plant from your shop a week ago and it looks terrible today. The leaves are drooping and the flowers are falling off.”

“How often have you watered the plant?”

“Oh, was I supposed to water it?”

Dah!

In addition to the customer service aspect of the retail flower shop, there is the arranging, processing, and delivering of flowers. I never thought that by the time I was nineteen years old I would have lifted the dead heads of multiple corpses to drape flowers in hair or across the heart. Can you even imagine? At those moments, I think, “Elyse, you should be feeling very sad, or sympathetic at very least.” Instead, I am either grossed out by the whole scene, or wishing I could try pinching the dang body to see if it really was once alive and real. Like, I’ll never forget the time I walked into the funeral home to lay a casket spray atop a box only to notice the face of the same old man who had come to order flowers from me the week before! Impossible, he was just here in the shop. I just saw him. The family is just trying to get sympathy from the community. Or maybe he staged the whole thing himself so he can collect his own insurance money. Really, the floral business really makes you wonder about people.

Men come looking hung-over or high in to order flowers because “I fu**ed up real bad,” hoping that tonight they’ll be able to climb back in bed with their wife...I have even had a gentlemen ask if the arrangement is alive. I mean seriously!? Are you seriously asking me if I’m going to send a dead arrangement? And today…Oh, Boy. I stole the title for this non-fiction essayblog right from the mouth of my last customer, today. Can you imagine!

“How can I help you sir?”

“I WANT SOME CHEAP FLOWERS FOR MY WIFE.”

And all this is as if the daily work involved in the floral business is not hard enough. When Fed-Ex delivers twenty four-foot long boxes that I (or we) need to haul through the narrow two foot wide hallway to stack six feet high on our metal table at the back of the shop, it then takes me hours to “process” them. Translated in the most simple of ways, to “process” flowers means to freshly cut the stems ½ inch so they will drink water, and then to drop them into a bucket with fresh water. This does not account for the thousand scratches from rose thorns, the green stains on my hands, my ever broadening shoulders from lifting buckets with water and flowers to place on high shelves and the effects of the Fahrenheit 40 degree cooler the flowers are stored in

Of course, there has been a lot of value to the experiences in the shop. I know how to gracefully handle a rude customer while giving him/her the finger behind my back. I know how to nod my head at the customer who wants to send yellow roses because they mean “I love you,” even though it is red roses that really send that message. And I understand the teamwork required to run a successful business, even if half the employees my parents decide to hire are incompetent. I have learned a lot about working in retail, working as part of a family-owned business, how to balance jobs, schoolwork, and teenage life, and more about flowers than I will ever want to know...yet i still love sending and receiving them (as long as they are not roses). And in (somewhat) retrospect, I'm sure the moms, daughters, and girlfriends that are lucky enough to have a man who sends flowers, are pretty lucky.

I stole this picture from Google, but none of the ones I had was as pretty.

Quote of the moment...

"It is not about possession and limits. It is about giving everything until there's nothing left to give, and then searching and scraping until you find a little bit more." --Harvesting the Heart, Jodi Picoult

List List List...

2009-06-15T23:14:00.004-04:00

If you are ever stuck in an airport alone for 15 hours i would suggest you make some lists, of anything! This recently happened to me and i made an assortment of fun little list that i hope to check off some day...they are as follows.

Places I want to visit slash live before I die...

Australia
Egypt
Cambodia (live)
Romania (live)
Mexico--3rd world part
Italy (live)
St. Thomas/ St. Martin
Jerusalem
Paris (live)
Africa--again the poor parts
Hawaii

Bucket List...
(Cliche i know but again i was at the airport for 15 hours...)

Bungee Jump off a bridge into water
sky dive
get married
fly first class
have at least 3 kids
go to ever continent
go to another Celine Dion concert
go to a john Mayer, Jason mraz, taylor swift, sara bareilles, sugarland, and kanye west concert
kiss a dolphin
buy a house
fly in a helicopter
have an all inclusive vacation
be a good teacher
ride on an elephant
adopt a child
swim with sharks
join the mile high club :)
camp in Africa
start and complete a wine cellar
see a tornado up close in person
trash a hotel room
go blueberry picking
go to a drive in movie
write a children's book
learn french...fluently
learn sign language...fluently
live in a 3rd world country
ride on a Farris wheel
be the first person on AND off the plane
spend an entire day just at a theme park on one roller coaster
love god
learn to play pachelbels canon on the violin and piano
scuba dive
see the northern lights in Alaska
be in NYC on new years
see at least one of the seven wonders of the world...preferably the pyramids
get my fortune told.
learn to make a cheesecake without it cracking down the middle
donate blood and eggs
have a garden

Reasons I hate to fly...

so stinking expensive
could crash
seats are always too straight for my back
nasty when people cough or sneeze...
flights are always delayed
the flight attendant never gives you the whole can of soda
so boring (hence this list by the way)
my ears always hurt the entire duration of the flight
ginormous people crammed into tiny seats
its loud, dark, and smelly
the sky mall magazine never changes it always has the same stupid pointless gifts no one needs but would be so cool to have---like the motor boat cup holder for the pool :)
hate peanuts but i hate it even more that there are only like 5 in the stinking tiny bag they give you.
either too cold or too hot
takes forever for people to get in their fricking seats!
creepy old men hitting on me
I'm scared to use the bathroom or sleep

First 10 things that come to my mind that I want

a vera bradley duffel bag
elijahs MP3 player
a college education
the perfect fathers day gift (i got this one already)
professionally framed pictures
a car...like one that isn't tore up!
original flavored chex mix
******a reading light!
every Jodi Picoult book ever written
season tickets to a sports event (baseball or basketball)

Top 5 questions that i want answers to at this very moment...

How can someone know me better than myself?
is there a God?
Where will I be in 5 years?
Will I be a good teacher?
Whats his favorite Disney movie?

Silly questions I want answers to before i marry...whoever.

What is your favorite Disney movie
least favorite food
will you get mad at me if i change the channel during your sports game on accident
how many kids
where do you want to get married
do you like the name Oliver
do you like pickles
what is your favorite color
do you like when girls wear perfume
would you rather me be all done up or bummy
favorite meal i could cook you, including drinks dessert and main dish
favorite song, movie, and music genre
will you sit through i musical with me
can you handle seeing a chick flick every now and then
what do you want to do that you would never actually do
can you kiss me
can you build things or i guess are you creative
what will our pet be and what will its name be...boy and girl
least favorite thing a girl does
favorite outfit...mine and yours.
Does it annoy you i cant spell and will ask you how to spell simple things
does it annoy you i spell out slash instead of putting the... "/" thingy?

So, once again, another pointless and waste of time post :)

"These are status worthy"

2009-06-08T18:08:00.010-04:00

So, i have spent the past week with the most adorable girl slash best friend slash partner in crime slash future maid of honor... and we are very silly together...or to some people "retarded"... and in honor of her i am going to make a list of fun quotes!...So it ended up being quotes from like everyone i hung out with.

Lauren: "You're like teen rebel except you're too old to act that way."

Elyse: "There is something about the summer air that makes me want to be scandalous."

Debbie (Laurens momma) "I love her floppy breast!"

Lauren: "I wonder if they would let two friends share a jail cell?

Elyse: "Oh my god that would be a blast, like a never ending sleepover!"

Ben(Laurens Brother): "NO SCAR NO!"

Ben:"Its like drug testing, except i don't lie to them...so in end it really saves them money, they should love me even more.

Lauren: "Dad, so listen to this story. We were walking out of the mall and Elyse was holding the door for this man who was carrying like patio chairs out, and then the sales person goes...um Hun you're holding an automatic door, but Elyse didn't hear her so she just stood there until i shouted Elyse its an automatic door!

Jeff: Were you born a blond?

Elyse: Apparently my dad says i have blond roots...

Lauren: "Mom, my car wont start...the battery is dead.

...15 min later after Debbie has arrived...

Lauren: "the radio works??"

Debbie: "Lauren is it in park!?!

Lauren: "oh shoot"

Elyse: "Holy Cow he is hot!"

Lauren: "he is taking off his shirt"

Elyse: "Wow, this is a thank you god moment."

Elyse: "1 bathing suit cover up, 4 tee shirts, 3 head bands, 1 pair of shoes, 2 pairs of panties....PRICELESS."

Lauren: "4 shirts, 2 cardigans, 5 pairs of panties, 1 dress, 1 bra, 2 earrings.....PRICELESS"

John: "jeremy, you want to know my favorite part about going to church?...the times we didn't go."

Elyse:"i would only make that kinda movie, if i was really depressed or in serious student debt."

Jeremy: "Don't say stuff like that"

Lauren: "i won't do it again..."

Elyse: "haven't you done it before?"

Elyse: "Is this like a goood i wanna marry your son someday shirt?

Lauren: "Yes, is this a good i want to be the maid of honor at your sons wedding someday shirt?"

Lauren: "Did that lady just flash me, or did i imagine that?"

Elyse: "I hope you didnt imagine it."

Elyse: "Well i havent really had a shot or a doctors appointment since i was like...8.

Lauren: "Elyse, you could have like...SWINE FLU!"

Elyse: "I dont like that they call the internet safari"

Lauren: I think its cool its like youre browsing through the safari."

Elyse: "How cool would it be if I married Jason Mraz?"

Becky: "it would make family holidays really awkward because we would be sitting at dinner and i would be eyeing your husband. Not to mention how insecure benjamin would be."

so this was at like...9am...

Elyse: I want to be her...

Lauren: You want beer?

Abbey: How was Marys Vineyard?

Elyse: Martha's Vineyard?...its really beachy

Abbey: Sis, what did you just call me.

Jeff: i wanna get your mother drunk
Debbie: no, im crazy enough without it.
Jeff: oh yea hun, you're real lose
**
Lauren: That pilot is kinda cute/
Elyse: I was thinking the very same thing.
Lauren: He can fly my plane
Me: He can revvvvv my engine
**
Lauren: I fell like were in that scene of final destination where were sitting watching the plane take off and its raining and then all of a sudden it blows up.
Me: Lauren! Don't say stuff like that!
**
...So this was after we got lost and i went into the gas station to ask for directions, and Hottie McHottness followed me back to the car and honked our car down...its less sketchy than this seems.
Hottie McHottness: Hey! I saw you in the gas station, im headed that way want to follow me?
Lauren: Yes...he was effing hot.

Elyse: we should just keep following him forget going back to your house lauren.
Chelsea: im going to get out and get his number...just incase he gets lost.
**
My Mom: Where do the scanlons live now?
Me: Marlown...some M name, whats the other "M" name?
Mom: I have no idea
Me: Woburn!
Dad: Yep, thats the other "M" one

holy cow :)

2009-05-29T02:11:00.012-04:00

Havent posted in forever, for more reasons than one :)

1. I do the same crap everyday... go to work, school, gym, food, homework, tv, bed, etc etc etc.
2. I am by no means a "wise" person with insightful things to say so blogging for me is virtually pointless
3. I have to be in the mood, and i just havent been
4. im REALLY bad at spelling so its kinda embarrassing. :)
4. and lastly i just suck at writing fun cute little things so i havent

BUT! lucky you i have decided to break the..whatever?...and blog most likely about nothingness..aka LIFE

Topic number uno: MY CUTE ADORABLE LITTLEBIG FAMILY

Who knew we would all come this far! anyone that knows me or my family knows we had a few rough patches (like any other family doesnt tho?). Anyways, i was looking at Abbeys adoption pictures and i am just flabbergasted at how much she has grown up...to the point i teared a little. She is no longer this goofy-mary-kate-and-ashley looking little 6 year old, hula dancing, or falling on her bum, but a top swimmer in the county and state that in going into middle school. Its weird i have never seen someone grow up, benjamin maybe but he was always older than me so its different, and he left before we got super close like now...but both abbey and elijah have grown (elijah more physically than emotionally :)) and i think it just really neat to see them do so. Then there is my cute little mamma, who may i add was a pain in my you know what a few years ago. I can honestly say that this is the most exciting and strange part of my family, my new relationship with her. She is my best friend and i think it is so awesome that i talk everyday with her even when im in college, and i love that i can now call her when i am pissy or annoyed with someone and she knows exactly what to say even if it is just i love you. Im truly truly to have a mother that i know loves me because her dad never said it to her, which i just cant imagine. shes so cute :) lastly benjamin and dadddddddy. love them both obviously but i found some old old cards from them and they made me cry because they said that they were proud of me )sounds Corney but it has hardly been said...) i kinda wonder if they still are sometimes because i haven't really don't or accomplished anything, especially since they were saying they were proud of the "spiritual woman" i was becoming...oh how the times change :/ (sorry enough sap!)

2. oldnesssss....

how did i become 19? i know its not that old but it is old and its weird because i look at pictures and i was like 10 and remember the everything i was doing that moment which is just weird to think considering that was almost 10 years ago!However it is weird because i think when people say that life is short its kinda crap...no it is not. Were here for like 80 years...well the majority of us? and think of all the stuff we do while we are here? travel to multiple places, fricking million years in school, so much wasted money, and silly drunkin nights, sky diving, adopting a sister, seeing a brother born, sending one so far to college, seeing two grandparents die, work by booty off, get a tattoo or two, eventually get marries (Hopefully once) have lot and lots and LOTS of babiess, etc etc etc, its a lot.

3. Confusionnnn slash uncertainty...!

this is the holy cow topic...i hate it point blank. i wish that i could know exactly what was going to happen, when i was going to grad college...if im going to finish school, how many kids i will have, what job i will have, what house i will live in, when my parents will die (ik weird), everything. i guess the whole point in life is uncertainty but it sucks nonetheless...and honestly how can i not know what i want at this exact moment whether it is as simple as what to have for breakfast or...something else... plus in any given situation someone or something ALWAYS loses or gets hurt. Who ever said you cant have it all was on the money. Lastly! how can the stupidly brilliant human brain not be able to tell me what to do or which decision would be best for my life? ...guess like my daddy always says i should "take the chance"... not to mention that we always always ALWAYS want what we, or i guess i, cant have. Like cake. love cake. but i also have to walk around a pool in basically nothing so cake is not an option. :) or we want to do what were not supposed to? My mom always told me the stove was hot, yet i have a scar from where i wanted to "prove" to my mom it was not...seriously? silly brain slash silly heart! fear plays a huge factor in uncertainty and confusion...especially for me. If i think that going out for cheesecake and leaving my sister alone will hurt her feelings i wont do it, im def. not too nice but there are certain people i want to make happy and never hurt and it always seems like thats not a possibility...again who ever said lifes not fair?...money statement. totally a notebook quote but the question "what do you want?" horrid horrid horrid question. who the heck knows what they want? yes i want a new phone, some money for school, a nicer car, an elliptical, etc but what do i want more than superficial crap? i cant tell ya, i want everything and everyone to be happy no matter what and not be affected (effected?) by my decisions. i wish i had a little person to make decisions for me or tell me what to do, wouldn't life be a joy then!

kind of abruptly stopping but its 2:45 so i can :)

Quote of the moment...

Guide your spirit safe and sheltered,
A thousand dreams that we can still believe...

kids say the darndest things!

2009-03-04T22:55:00.006-05:00

So i have been trying how to figure out how to upload pictures to a blog and i just did! So im posting twice in one day! how that for blogging!!

i nanny for 3 kids (Ella 7, Amelia (or ace) 4, and Guss (or gussy) 16 months). they are amazing and super funny and incredably well behavied. im talking "miss elyse may i please have more juice" "miss elyse i like your hair" and "miss elyse can you please cut this up for me" ...no wonder i like them so much!!! anyways here they are, my wonderful ella amelia and gussy.

yay for kidsssssss :)

Bad Blogger! How Dare You!

2009-03-04T13:49:00.003-05:00

So according to Melissa i am a "bad blogger" so i thought i would attempt to be a good blooger :)

honestly i havent really had much to blog about. My life had been pretty simple, school on mondays and wed. and work every other day of my life :). Although i had a really interesting education class today.

i have never been to school in all 18 years, sat in a classroom, and thought wow i could actually be really good at this. That is until now! I fully understand everything that my edu. teacher is saying and i am so intrigued about all the different aspect of teaching and the way that childrens minds develop. Did you know that in 1877 it only cost $2.41 for each child per year!? and now it costs nearly 10000 per year!!! and in 1747 the average person only went to school 81 days in a LIFETIME!! Now its a required 180 per year! nuts. anyways i cant wait to be a teacher, and i dont care if i dont make 80000 a year, at least i have the satisfaction of teaching Americas youth (haha a direct quote from my edu teacher) Also i think it will be perfect for when i become a mom. Think about it, as weird or anit-feminism as it is, all i want to do in life is have a really fun hot adorable husband, have great kids, and be able to cook and clean and take care of my family. The hours that i will work perfectly coincide with my future kids schedule. all in all im super excited!!

On another note...sally and i went apartment shopping yesterday and found the apartment of the lifetime!!!!!! it had painted walls, an island, huge living and dining room, a back porch, the biggest closet i have ever seen, double vanity sinks, hard wood floors, and a tiled kitchen. Its perfect, aside from the fact its $1250 a month. For sally this is fine because her parents pay for everything, but for me my rent is 500 now and going up two hundred dollars is somewhat troublesome! same goes for rob his rent is $1080 a month and his parent pay half. i dont really think either one really understand how hard it would be if they had to pay for everything by themselves, and i probl. sound like a whiner but it tough! and super stressful...i think sally especially takes it for granted at times, (love her to death) but she has got it made! no college tuition bills, she get money for food, rent, gas, etc. To me its kinda sad that money has such an influence on what people do in life, especially when one works two jobs just to pay off everything...i guess welcome to adulthood huh!

thats my thought for today...not very engaging haha.

My First Blog :)

2009-02-18T13:57:00.003-05:00

Oh what fun this is! i saw becky and melissas blog and decided that i would make one as well...guess im a follower :) In my defence i feel like reading their blogs made me feel more connected now that i live a bizillion miles away.
****(just a little side notez: i reread this and it is somewhat blunt and rant-ish...sorry!)****

I love reading beckys and hearing about my brother and everything that is going on in their lives. It made me sad today because, while im sitting in my utterly useless literature class, i realized just how much i miss them! I thought the whole time in NC that boston was right for me, and it just wasnt. I didnt see the people who i was hoping to see and spend time with as much as i had imagined. It was even more clear that i should move when i became at odds with one of my best friends..long sotry...In addition paying 40000 dollars for school was merely impossible for me. I dont at all regret living in Boston in fact, im quite sure i would have regretted it if i never went. Anyways, back to beckys blog :) I think reading it i get a sense of encouragement. I love hearing all the funny things that jack and katie say, and im truely amazed at the patience that becky has. i think that everything she juggles is incredible.

Im somewhat hesitant to doing bloggs because its like a public diary, which is stinking scary! I am by no means a put together person, even on my best days. i am completely confused and sometimes just completely lost. A quick example is alot of other blogs i have read are about the bible which just confuses the heck out of me, and to make it worse i cant express in words whats confusing me. I guess i hope someday it will just be clear what to believe in and what i should follow, because i really do miss church. last week in my ethics class, i was challenged. I made an argument that much of religion is based off of faith... and to be perfectly honest i have no idea what religion is based off of. I am scared beyond belief to go to church because ever since i moved to north Carolina it has been a complete disappointment. After leaving The Triangle Church Of Christ, i probelly attended 25+ churches, and my fmaily still didnt find one that was "good enough" or "right." Well how am i supposed to know what is right now? I thought that Boston church of crist and triangle were right, but apparently i was completely blinded about what was going on. It makes me sad because i really miss going to church and having that connection with other people. Excuse my bluntness but i feel somewhat screwed over by God because i feel completely left alone. My family has been looking for a church for the past 6 years and they still cant find one? My dad always says that God has a purpose for everything but i realy cant see the reason behind moving to nc. if anything it made me lose 100% faith in God. i dont trust he wants whats best for me because, i dont think he wants whats best for my family becayse of everything that has happened since moving. Im not unrealistic either. i know that my life will not be perfect, and my families life will not be perfect. Im not asking that of God, but we have been close to miserable since moving, so where is the help?? Then friends come into play. Today for some reason i am just in that mood where i miss someone a lot and its completely killing me. I think that some of what has happened is my fault and some is the other persons. But i dont know if there is a worse feeling that losing someone you cared about more than anyone. Its like someone in my family has died and is gone forever, and i know i have never had a direct family member die but, man, i sure feel like i have. All i can say is its not fair. I miss this person and there is nothing i can do about it...

i could go on forever and probably will as the posts go on...but needless to say today has been rough on my emotions!!!

haha on a lighter note im going on my first ever snowboarding trip this friday! hopefully i wont break anything!!!!